limericks

A Limerick for Mary (from Ron “Chips” Lies)

I am going to post a limerick here by the great Isaac Asimov. The limerick is about The Sign of Four, which I will be posting about in the next few days. That is not the total reason that I am posting.

This limerick has been a love poem from myself to my wife, Mary. And I want to spread the word about just how fantastic a wife my Mary has been and how incredibly lucky I am to have her fall in love with me and stay with me through all the good and bad times for 45 years now and at least that many more.

The Sign of the Four

Muttered Sherlock” Never mind Cocaine’s pleasure,
Let us seek out the famed Agra Treasure.”
Answered Watson,”No pearls,
For Myself—only girls;
And its Mary who is made to my measure.”
-Isaac Asimov, BSI (and so much more)

[That is beautiful. I seem to have something in my eye… -Selena Buttons]

Limerick Corner: Sussex Vampire

Two more limericks today:

The Adventure of the Sussex Vampire

There’s a beautiful wife from Peru
Whose behavior has Bob in a stew.
He tells Holmes that she’s wild;
That she’s bitten their child.
Can it be we’ve a vampire in view?
-Issac Asimov, BSI

The Sussex Vampire

Though Ferguson hoped for protection
From a vampire, Holmes’s detection
Revealed that the nibbling
Was caused by the sibling,
Begrudging his father’s affection.
-Wallace W Higgins

Yolanda Vazquez as Carlotta Ferguson (Granada, 1993)

Limerick Corner: Sussex Vampire

Since we have nothing as recorded for this date in the source book I use for daily occurrences, I am including another limerick on the Sussex Vampire. This one is from that very talented limerick author and member of our group, Sandy Kozinn (JHWS “Roxie” and ASH “Esmeralda”).

Two stokers inside a ventilation cowl on the HMS Spiteful, 1901 (Black & White Illustrated Budget, December 21, 1901)

The Adventure of the Sussex Vampire

There once was a wicked young boy,
Poisoned weapons his favorite toy.
Maimed his dog. For another,
tried to kill his young brother,
off to sea with that vicious young boy!

-Esmeralda

Chips says: I have a built in hatred of any one who hurts a animal other than for the reason of self-protection or others’ protection. Therefore, young Jacky in this story committed – in my opinion – the ultimate crime and deserves the ultimate punishment: becoming shark food would be too good for him but it would keep him from harming another of God’s creatures again.

Just a thought…

[Capital punishment by shark seems a little bit harsh. He could probably use a good scare, though. -Selena Buttons]

Limerick Corner: Sussex Vampire

We have nothing recorded as from the Canon for this date, so I felt that a limerick for this story from the author of the source book I use for daily occurrences in the Cannon would fit in well here.

Richard Dempsey as Jack Ferguson (Granada, 1993)

The Adventure of the Sussex Vampire

The Babe’s mother sucked blood from his neck,
Of her Husband it made quite a wreck.
Jacky poisoned the child,
So young Jack was exiled
To a whole year at sea, what the heck!

William S Dorn, BSI, DWNP

Just a random thought: How would a year at sea and before returning to the family have cured young Jacky of his hatred for his stepbrother? What would have cured him?

Limerick Corner: A Toast to Sherlock Holmes

Last night, the Curious Collectors of Baker Street held an event called “Sherlock Gets Schooled” – an evening all about Holmes’s own education and the broader subject of schools in the Canon. I was asked to give the toast to Sherlock Holmes, and I decided to try my hand at writing a limerick.

My hat is officially off to those of you who write all those clever limericks!

Since our dear “Chips” is a fan of limericks, and it happens to be his birthday today, I’d like to share my very first (and quite possibly last!) Sherlockian limericks.

Sherlock Holmes shares few facts from his past
So tiny details large shadows cast
Ribbons athletes sport
Take on great import
If they name his alma mater at last

He was clearly a Cambridge man, some claim
Others carry the Oxonian flame
Wherever his class
Let’s all raise a glass
To the Master, and his own good name

To Sherlock Holmes!

Limerick Corner: Hound of the Baskervilles

A two-part limerick from Sandy Kozinn (JHWS “Roxie”):

Someone’s killing at Baskerville, and fast.
Will the current heir end up the last?
His chances were poor:
The hound howled on the moor.
Then Holmes saw that picture from the past.

The experience wasn’t much fun,
And the end bad for ‘most everyone.
Moral: Don’t walk at night
When a dog might shine bright
Or the way through the swamps been undone.

Limerick Corner: IDEN and ILLU

In honor of the ongoing Canonical events this week, two more limericks from Sandy Kozinn (JHWS “Roxie”):

On the sidewalk poor Mary did dither,
As her thoughts flew hither and thither,
Why did Angel disappear?
Was he dead? Oh, the fear!
Holmes knew Windibank’s? Love was just blither.

With china the man was an ace,
That Baron, he took the first place,
But with femmes he was mean,
The worst to be seen,
So revenge got him right in the face.

More from Limerick Corner

Illustration by Ralph C. Criswell for the Los Angeles Times (March, 1925)

As promised yesterday, the second in a pair of limericks about “The Creeping Man” by Sandy Kozinn (JHWS “Roxie”):

It turned out, as Presbury found,
His behavior would bother his hound.
If your nature you’d change,
You’d better arrange
Not to have your old dog hang around.

Have a limerick you’d like to share? Let us know in the comments!

From Limerick Corner

Illustration by Ralph C. Criswell for the Los Angeles Times (March, 1925)

No Canonical events today or tomorrow, so we take the opportunity to present with pride the first of a pair of limericks from our dear “Roxie”, Sandy Kozinn, about “The Creeping Man”.

Presbury wanted more youth,
Unbecoming, to tell you the truth.
When he took monkey gland,
It affected him, and
Turned him into a being uncouth.

 

Check back tomorrow for the second part!

On September 1st…

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, starring Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce, premiered on September 1, 1939. It was the second film of 14 starring the duo, but it was the last one to be produced by Fox, and the last one to be set in the Victorian period of the original stories. The film involves a plot by Moriarty to steal the crown jewels from the Tower of London (a plotline that got a nod in an episode of a certain BBC television series).

In honor of the occasion, Chips shares a limerick composed by Sandy Kozinn (JHWS “Roxie”, ASH “Esmeralda”):

As the script read, he sometimes played the fool.
Detective’s foils are silly; that’s the rule.
Born in 1895.
Wish he were still alive.
Nigel Bruce on the screen was a jewel.

(Sources: A Curious Collection of Dates: Through the Year with Sherlock Holmes, by Leah Guinn (JHWS “Amber”) and Jaime N Mahoney (JHWS “Tressa”); IMDb.)

From Limerick Corner

I have the author’s permission to publish this limerick, and I felt that there is such a great description here I wanted my fellow members to see and appreciate the quality. Tomorrow I have an article about Dr Watson’s finest moment by this same author that I think you will really
enjoy. My first love in Sherlockian research is limericks so this one is first. I hope you understand and allow me my passion. -Chips

SHERLOCK HOLMES LIMERICK
by Carl & Sandie Heifetz

(Presented at the Pleasant Places of Florida Sherlock Holmes Birthday Bash, January 17, 1998; Cité Grill: Dundin, Florida), Published in The Hounds Collection Vol. 4, p 70, Bill Barnes 1999.

Sherlock Holmes, a detective from London,
Could not tolerate puzzles too humdrum.
He looked at all trifles,
Butts, tracks, and air rifles,
And used Science to solve each conundrum.
He was the best London detective,
Who thought police methods defective,
He placed his reliance,
On methods of Science,
And used logic that was quite objective.
On all of the clues he would meditate,
While smoking his pipe would eliminate,
All items impossible,
But not the improbable,
And then his hypotheses validate.

A Limerick for March 21st

For my posting on this date I am going to publish a limerick that I promised some one near and dear to me that I would. I hope my partner and co-columnist will understand. I think she will. [Of course! -Selena Buttons]

So, to honor the Author’s memory and to keep my word, here is a special limerick for the start of “A Scandal in Bohemia” written by a Special Sherlockian as part of his series.

When the King had his way with Irene,
The pictures they took were obscene.
But her consortin’
With Godfrey Norton
Meant those pictures remained unseen.

May God bless you Don where ever you are.

Ron

Limericks

There is no event on file for August 17th or 18th.  Since the last case was CREE, how about three limericks by a wonderfully talented Sherlockian and Hound of the Internet who is sorely missed? Which ending line do you like? Let me know, and on with the show!

The Creeping Man

He ventured out every ninth night,
To scramble up trees in delight.
But then he was seized
By the dog he’d teased
Whose fangs tore his throat with one bite.

-Don Dillistone, November, 2002

The Creeping Man

He ventured out every ninth night,
To scramble up trees in delight.
But then he was seized
By his dog whom he’d teased,
Who slashed his throat with a well-placed bite.

-Don Dillistone, November, 2002

The Creeping Man

He ventured out every ninth night,
To scramble up trees in delight.
But then he was seized
By the dog he’d teased,
Who ripped his throat with a savage bite.

-Don Dillistone, November, 2002

A Limerick

Note from Carla Buttons: I am pleased to reintroduce Tid Bits, written by our dear friend Ron “Chips” Lies as he now works to improve his health and continue his Sherlockian studies.

This a limerick I found and I enjoyed the picture that was created. I hope you enjoy it also.

Oh give me a home where Sherlockians roam
Where Watson is faithful and true,
Where seldom is heard a non canonical word
And anything could be a clue.

The author is the illustrious scholar, Christopher Redmond from his book, A Sherlock Holmes Handbook, second edition, page one.

So. Write and let Chips what you might think of it

Christmas Limerick

Isaac Asimov and his limerick for “The Adventure of the Blue Carbuncle”:

On the goose behind (fat and fine)
The Peterson Family may dine.
Then they find a large jewel—-
But can Sherlock be cruel?
It is Yule! To forgive is divine!

Chips wishing all a blessed and Joyous Christmas !

” “Tis the Season to be Watson . . .”

Here is a delightful limerick by Bruce R Beaman from A Baker Street Christmas; cover illustration by Sidney Paget; Stevens Point, WI; The Yellow Face Press, Christmas 1981; limited to 221 copies.

“A cold wind sends snow down this old gaslit street
While at 221b’s door you may happen to meet
Doctor Watson returning from a medical case,
Or Sherlock himself, from a criminal chase.”

A Limerick

This from our good “Chips”

A Snip and a Snort

A snip and a snort on the list,
Are something I’d never have missed.
They’re not worse than a pun,
So take it as fun.
Someday they’ll be lost in the mist.

—by Sandy Kozinn, “Roxie” and “Esmerelda”
a Sherlockian amongst Sherlockians

“Chips’s” Weekly Limericks

To all:

I have received permission from two members of The Hounds of the Internet to post their limericks and here are examples. Please let me know in the “comments” section if you have limericks, poems, sonnets, or other word pictures you would like to see posted.  

The Gloria Scott

To Australia once he was sent,
But escaped and set up as a gent,
Till the castaway’s greed
And the “fly-paper” screed
Taught Trevor what Nemesis meant.

Mr Henry Baker

“He spoke in a slow staccato fashion,

choosing his words with care,
and gave the impression of a man of learning and letters
who had had ill-usage at the hands of fortune.”

            — in the light of common day, Oliver Mundy

Gloria Scott

Nuts being cracked and some port,
But the munching was quickly cut short.
Your hen-pheasant’s life
Brought serious strife
When Old Trevor slipped out for a snort.

            — Matilda, from the lumber camps of Michigan, aka Bill Briggs

 All my best,
Chips

Ron Lies “Chips” and the Weekly Limerick

Here is “Chips'” Limerick of the Week:

In the 1940s Edgar W. Smith wrote, “We love the times in which he lived, of course, the half-remembered, half-forgotten times of snug Victorian illusion, of gas lit comfort and contentment, of perfect dignity and grace. And we love the place: the England of those times, fat with the fruits of her achievements, but strong and daring still with the spirit of imperial adventure. But there is more than time and space and the yearning of things gone by to account for what we feel toward Sherlock Holmes. Not only there and then, but here and now, he stands as a symbol, if you please, of all that we are not, but ever would be. We see him as the fine expression of our urge to trample evil and to set aright the wrongs with which the world is plagued. He is Galahad and Socrates, bringing high adventure to our dull existences and calm, judicial logic to our biased minds.”

Limerick for The Hound of the Baskervilles

So here’s to that wonderful Hound,
Who crossed the moor with a bound,
He glowed in the night,
A terrible sight,
And did make a frightening sound.

Author William S Dorn BSI, DWNP,from his book and card set, The Limericks of Sherlock Holmes, published by Pencil Productions, 2005.

All my best,
Chips